I hope Clinton wins for my daughter

I have always enjoyed watching Michael Moore because he does background research that eclipses most other journalists.

I watched his documentary about Trump and Clinton last night. I found it struck a chord with me in a way I did not expect. When you hear the background, intelligence, and success Hillary has acheived, In a time when it was not normal for women to be doing such things, it is difficult to understand why people are suspicious of her. It is difficult to understand why Trump has any kind of a chance.

Hillary could wipe the floor with him any day in terms of experience, intellect, diplomacy, nerve. The programme made me wonder, if Hillary was a man, would this be no contest at all?

There is still something in western society that dislikes ambitious women. Women who take the lead, who think outside the box, who are “bossy”. Capable women are fine as long as they stay under the radar and are not obviously ambitious. Be a bookish and intelligent woman, but do this quietly in the background and please don’t make your ambition known as you will be torn down. Torn down as untrustworthy.  As irrational, or a ball breaker or cruella de vile. You will be shouted down by a pig ignorant Donald Trump.

Michael Moore pointed out that many years ago, a young Clinton visited Estonian maternity wards due to their excellence in that field. She was looking at what could be learned for the US and learning about universal health care. Probably at this time Trump was sexually assaulting women on a regular basis. He calls women ugly on his rallies. He has been recorded admitting to sexually assaulting women. He is not in your corner ladies.

I hope Amercian people will consider the fact that it is probably instinctive to be suspicious of an ambitious female candidate, it is called social conditioning. Please override this in favour of picking the best person for the job. Don’t vote against yourselves, your sisters, your mothers and your daughters.





Baby’s first birthday!

So yesterday my little baby turned one! We had the first birthday party last weekend, for ten babies and toddlers. That was manic but enjoyable although next time I may hire a hall rather than host at home!

On her actual birthday, we opened some presents, then spent the day with an assortment of family visitors. H loved her new presents but mostly loved a ribbon which was tied around one of the presents!

I had the Thursday and Friday off work, so spent four days with her. They were four good days, and she showed me her little personality is continuing to grow. She has already got a devilish sense of humour. She is showing me her independence and loves free crawling and walking around furniture. She loves being silly and laughing with people. She is still loving and when she is sleepy loves cuddles with mummy.

Her birthday was one of mixed emotions for me. 95 per cent of me was happy and excited about the future. A little part of me feels sad that the year has gone so fast and my little baby is growing up. Birthdays are a reminder of how precious time is and how quickly it can pass. For me, working full time, this gives me a pang of guilt. Am I missing more than I should? I try to be “present” when I am with H but sometimes house work has to be done, or I need to clean her bottles, prep her food etc.

That said, There is no easier time to be in the moment than when you are with a one year old. They live for the here and now! I only hope I can create happy memories of a happy home and childhood for her.



Happy Haven Holidays

We have just got back from five days at Burnham-On-Sea Haven resort. This was our second family holiday having previously gone to Butlins with H in March. We fancied a traditional British seaside break with some on site facilities to make life easier with a 10 month old.

Did we get that? Yes we did! I think the great weather (apart from the torrential thunderstorms on Tuesday) made life a lot easier for us.

We stayed in a Delux caravan which was lovely. The cot bed fit in the main bedroom which was a relief. The site was very quite, clean and tidy and we were next to a lovely lake. We woke up to ducks every morning, as well as a large number of seagulls! One morning I opened our door and a mummy duck and lots of ducklings trotted over!

The site was located close to the beach and the town. Burnham on Sea is a lovely quiet sea side town. It does not have the busy promenade or sea front of Weston, but does have lots of shops and resturants on its high street tucked around the corner.

On site was a small but clean and family friendly swimming pool, and we enjoyed a swim on the rainy day with H. There is also a pub and some amusement arcades (which do my head in but hubby is partial to the two pence machines).

The evening entertainment was not up to the professional standards of Butlins, but there were some nice things to do with H in the day. We took her to a sensory class, with Anxious the elephant who she loved. We also did a music class which again she loved. There was a puppet show which she enjoyed. They also did a number of things for older children.

We ate in the town on two evenings. We took H with us and the resturants were generally very family friendly. We had a lovely Italian meal at La Vela. We also had a tasty and very affordable Indian at Zalshah.

We had a day in neighbouring Weston Super Mare, which always rocks. It was scorching hot and it felt like we were abroad!

We also visited the Apex park which is free and has a fab park with a good toddler and baby section!

So all in all, we had a great time. H had the time of her life! weston




(we wanna)Work from home

Thursdays are my work from home days. I argued hard to get one of these, which are like gold dust in the legal sector.

In my head (pre baby) I would sit in the conservatory, coffee cup to one side, laptop in front of me, files in an organised and tidy pile to the other. My baby would be playing quietly in the play pen or sleeping whilst I knocked up my chargeable hours.

Obviously any parent to a ten month old will tell you its not quite like this! You have to keep stopping what you are doing to feed your baby, play with your baby, make milk, stop baby hitting her head on the fireplace or climbing onto the TV stand etc etc.

Today did go well. Baby H was in a good mood and slept quite a bit in the day giving me time to get a lot of work done. I started early and did not stop but it seemed to be a day of balance. Work is fitted in when I can anytime from 6.30am to 9pm, but I get to give H her meals, take her to the park, and generally spend some time with her during the day. This makes me feel more of a presence in her life and eases the “mum guilt”.

It is not by any means an easy option. In fact I would probably say, aside from the lack of commute and the fact I do not have to slap on the war paint, its actually a tougher gig than being at the office, especially when hubby is at work. However, it gives me opportunity to stay connected at home and to my family whilst working full time, and that’s why it is priceless!



Baby Danger Mouse

This weekend I have been lucky enough to have Friday and Monday off so have four days to spend with H (and Hubby for two).


What has amazed me during the last few days is how much she has developed and all the new things she is doing. I thought I was on top of it but clearly a lot goes on between 8am and 6pm when I’m out of the house!

I have seen her crawl of course but suddenly she is the speed demon crawler. She has a sixth sense for anywhere off limits (fire place, TV, bin, electrical sockets) and speeds over giggling when I tell her to stop! This child laughs in the face of danger!! I think she likes to see mummy leap of the sofa or crawl after her!

My mum came over yesterday and she waved at her and said “bye”!! I have not seen her do this and it was a heart warming moment. As I cooed her and called her a clever girl she did it again and again beaming with pride!  My mum was sat on the sofa with a cuppa and not planning on leaving for another couple of hours, so may have been given a slight complex!!

She presses the buttons on her V Tec book and rocks or dances to the tunes!  And most impressively she can now sit up from lying on the floor, even if she pulls the same face I used to pull doing sit ups in the gym.  I told Hubby about the sitting up and he casually informed me she had been sitting up for afew days!! Mummy is missing out!!

It seems as she approaches ten months that time is flying past and she is speeding through her developmental stages. Its amazing to see her little personality coming out and this seems to be a fantastic age for a baby. However given her speed and desire to play with electrical sockets or to hit her head on the fireplace, I feel I need to baby proof my house.

Before I had H, I did not understand the danger that lurked in every corner of our house. When we brought our house, I thought the long lounge diner would be ideal for a family. I did not think, oh no my baby will hit her head on the sliding patio doors leading into our conservatory. I did not think the fireplace would be permenantly covered in cushions to prevent a head knocking the marble surround. A TV is no longer a TV, it is a large object capable of falling on my baby and squashing her. And we do not have a coffee table – its just not worth the risk!

I feel I have turned into a health and safety officer. And it continues in other peoples houses. I have become “that guest” who asks if people would mind moving their coffee table a bit so H doesn’t hit her head. I think ideally, my house would have no furniture, and the walls would be padded with cushions. As this is not an option, I fear my next two years will be spent chasing a small person around the house yelling “stop”!

H loves me doing this however and thinks we play a game where she crawls super fast to the sockets and mummy chases after her. Little pickle!!




Sunday night feeling


Why is it that even as a fully fledged grown up mum of one, Sunday evenings leave me with a sinking feeling! Not that anything compares to the feeling I had the night before the end of my maternity leave. That was what can only be described as an emotional meltdown moment where I was floored by sudden and unexpected “mum guilt” (more on that later!!).

However that was over a month ago now and although I feel generally like I am back in the swing of things, I still dislike Sunday evenings. So in a bid to lift my spirits and encourage reflection on the previous weekends festivities, I have decided to start a blog!

About me? I am a first-time mum to H (9.5 months, ). I am married to Hubby who is a paramedic (a very well respected profession which earns him praise wherever we go).  I work as a solicitor (which is often up there with estate agents and accountants in the popularity stakes) in a high street firm. I  returned to work full time a month ago. This has been a tad surreal and there have been some testing moments. This does not include the fact that none of my pre-baby clothes fit and so I had to whizz to Next to restock a whole work wardrobe. I have even gone up a shoe size!! Damn those chocolate biscuits at the baby groups!

H cut her first tooth the evening of my first day at work. I picked her up from her granny’s house and she was doing a weird wailing noise and crying real tears (she is not much of a crier). This carried on well past her usual bedtime and required lots of cuddles from mummy and daddy to soothe her. This made me feel like a super shit mum for leaving her all day, but then the tooth appeared the next morning and this has not happened since. Phew.

Also she has had a cold for over a week which resulted in me having to get up and comfort her and wipe her snotty nose two or three times in the night. However with the help of my BFF coffee I made it through. In fact I would go further and say I have enjoyed being at work again and using the old rusty brain. I have full respect to stay at home parents, it is exhausting. I think it is in fact harder than going to work as there is no praise at home. The baby loves you but can’t talk to thank you for your hard work and recommend you to their friends.

So…that’s me! H has woken up and is dramatically sucking her thumb to let me know she wants her milk, so must dash. Thanks for reading!